A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
- Proverbs 17:7
There is much to be said about a good friend – we all want one and we all want to be considered as one. A good friend journeys with you on the ups and downs of life. A good friend stands by you when times are tough. A good friend listens well without judgment. A good friend won’t shy away from the truth, even when it’s painfully hard to hear. A good friend often considers your needs as more important than their own. And, most importantly, a good friend will point you to Jesus.
I find the friendship of John and Peter remarkable and intriguing. John was contemplative and reflective, and Peter was boisterous and bold, and both were loyal in their own unique ways. Their friendship story is subtly woven throughout all four gospels. It’s never at the forefront, for Jesus holds that spot. But it’s there, quietly in the background, weaving a beautiful tapestry of example to us believers.
By trade, Peter and John were fishermen. Together they were fishing partners (Lk 5:10); Peter ran a boat with his brother Andrew, and John ran a boat with his brother James (Mt 4:18-22). After a long night of catching zero fish, Jesus called out to Peter to let his net down on the other side of his boat. Peter remarked that they had spent all night and caught nothing but consented and threw the net down. Much to his surprise, the net filled so full of fish, that it was breaking. He called to his partners in the other boat to come and help. John and James came and worked hard to manage the abundance of fish, filling both boats so full that they both began to sink (Lk 5:1-7).
Astonished and undone, Peter asked Jesus to depart from him for he was a sinful man. In response, Jesus beckoned Peter to follow Him. And moments later, Jesus beckoned the others to follow him as well. It was there that Jesus told them that they were going to be fishers of men. It was then that they left all that they had and followed Jesus as his first disciples (Lk 5:8-11).
And as they followed Jesus from town to town, they heard His sermons and parables. They witnessed Him healing those afflicted with diseases and demons (even Peter’s own mother-in-law!). They witnessed the winds and waters obey Him. And they witnessed Jesus proclaim that he had the power and authority to forgive people of their sins. Peter and John (and James) were in the inner circle of Jesus’ disciples and had the privilege to witness the transfiguration of Jesus on the mountain (Lk 9:28-26) and were given the responsibility to stay up and pray for Jesus the final hours before his betrayal, trial, and crucifixion (Mt 26:36-46).
The night that Jesus was arrested, both Peter and John followed Jesus (Jn 18:15). John, having known the high priest, was permitted to enter into the courtyard of the high priest. But Peter was left just outside the courtyard walls by the charcoal fire. It was there by that fire that he denied knowing Jesus three times, just like Jesus had predicted at the Last Supper. He wept bitterly and went out of the courtyard (Lk 22:54-62). John, however, stayed. Not many other details are given as to where and when John was throughout the rest of Jesus’ trial and journey to Golgotha, but we know that he was there when Jesus took his final breaths. Jesus, seeing John near his mother Mary, entrusted her to his care. And John willingly accepted (Jn 19:25-27).
It was John and Peter who Mary Magdalene ran to when she found Jesus’ tomb was empty; believing that his body was stolen. And both of them took off running to see it for themselves. John made it there first, but Peter boldly and courageously looked inside the tomb before John. Both saw the linen cloths lying there. Both saw the face cloth folded up in a place by itself. Both didn’t fully understand what the empty tomb meant. Both went back to their homes (Jn 20:1-10). Both resumed being fishermen.
One evening, Peter went out to fish and several disciples joined him. They caught nothing all night. Jesus appeared on the shore at dawn and asked if they caught any fish, to which they replied, “nothing.” Jesus told them to cast their net on the right side of the boat and so they did. And just like the first time they met Jesus, their net was filled full with an abundance of fish. But this time, John and Peter were in the boat together, and John leaned over to Peter and said, “It is the Lord!”
The Bible doesn’t tell us what words were exchanged between Peter and John after his denial and Jesus’ death. But I imagine that John listened well as Peter retold the story of his grievous sin. I imagine John reminded Peter of Jesus’ heart and comforted him that Jesus forgave those who seemed most unforgiveable. I imagine that John stuck by Peter even when Peter felt unlovable and unworthy.
Thus, when Jesus opened John’s eyes that day that the man on the shore was Him, I think John recognized that it was by God’s grace that he recognized Jesus. And instead of keeping that grace for himself, he shared it to Peter. Like the time at the tomb, John could have beat Peter there. John could have jumped into the water first and then told Peter that it was Jesus. But he held back and let Peter go first. I think John knew that Peter needed that moment to swim to the very one who extends grace beyond measure.
There are times when you will need to be like John – reminding your friend of the tenderness of Jesus’ heart and that we will never outgrow our need for His grace. There will be times where you will have to point them to Him when their eyes can’t see Him clearly and then give them space to run to the throne of grace.
And then there will be times where you will feel like Peter – that your grievous sin is unforgiveable. Don’t hide in your shame, but like Peter, find a friend who will be with you through the thick and thin, a friend who will remind you that Jesus’ heart is gentle and humble and will point you to the throne of grace. A friend who will remind you that Jesus is the best friend and will never leave or forsake you.
Prayer: Father, you are faithful and merciful. I thank you that Jesus is the best friend and that He will never leave me or forsake me. Help me to speak truth to my friends and point them to Him when they are suffering or in sin. And by Your grace, keep my heart humble so that I will listen to the words of my friends when I need them most. Open my eyes and my heart to run to the throne of grace and be restored to you.
Reflection Questions:
- Read Matthew 26:47-50 and reflect on how Jesus addressed Judas. (Side note: Judas did not repent of his evil). But how does Jesus’ words of calling Judas ‘friend’ show us His very heart and desire to restore people to Himself?
- Who is your greatest friend on this earth? Why? Take time to thank them for their friendship and ask them how you can be a friend to them today.
- A verse from the hymn, “What a friend we have in Jesus,” states:
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer!
– is there something that is besetting you? Take time to give it to Jesus in prayer.
